After waiting a grueling 50 minutes in a doctor’s office before being seen, Brendan, who initially asked to be identified only by his first name out of fear of retaliation, decided to strike back at the entire medical establishment. His method of revenge? Scheduling dozens of appointments with multiple physicians and then never showing up.
“I thought it would just be a funny way to get back at doctors,” said Brendan. “At least that’s what I thought until the harassment started.”
According to Brendan, the American Medical Association soon issued an indirect but chilling rebuke via social media: “All patients are required to attend their appointments. If a patient does not give 24 hours’ notice before canceling, they must pay a $50 late fee. Anyone who disobeys these rules is considered a terrorist and will be treated as such.”
Brendan says the intimidation didn’t stop there. After repeatedly ghosting his appointments and refusing to pay no-show fees, he began receiving death threats in the mail. One note reportedly read: “We’re watching you, Brendan. Just know that you won’t miss your appointment in Hell.”
Now in hiding, Brendan claims the AMA has placed a contract on his life. “I can’t even go near a Walgreens without looking over my shoulder,” he said.
Update: After being shot by a hitman disguised as a physician, Brendan was rushed to a nearby hospital. He was discharged days later with instructions to schedule a follow-up appointment.